Adolescent Self Esteem
A Parent’s Guide To Reinforcing Adolescent Self Esteem
As parents, we can help our teenaged children deal with problems regarding their self esteem through intervening solutions that we can extend at the right moment and to the right degree. Causes Of Problems Regarding Adolescent Self-Esteem Before we can learn how to aid our teenagers when it comes to facing their confidence issues, we must first know where these problems come from. This way we can opt to try a preventive approach first, instead of immediately implementing curative actions. * Hormonal changes. Many of the esteem issues our teenagers are having stem from the emotional and mental changes they are undergoing, which in turn can be attributed to the chemical changes in their bodies. Hormonal balance moves from the demands of a child’s body to the needs of an adult’s. * Social changes. An adolescent will likewise have to find his role – his identity – in the new groups he will be dealing with. Some manage to do this easily. Others grope for form, which may result in adolescent self esteem problems as well. * Peer pressure. Even if an adolescent manages to find his identity easily, everything’s not up to him. People – teenagers included – are social beings. The people around us help define who we are. Sometimes, negative input from these people will cause teenagers to develop issues with their self esteem. * Physical changes. Acne, developing breasts, testicular erection, obesity, thinness, and other physical manifestations of growing up can affect a teen’s confidence. These are to be expected. Reinforcement Procedures Adolescent self esteem issues will have a variety of consequences ranging from being shy and timid, to being rebellious of authority, to being overly aggressive to compensate for the teen’s perceived shortcomings. Not all of these consequences are negative, however. Some teens suffering from adolescent self esteem problems manage to channel their concerns into productive activities that develop their creativity, their industriousness and other skills that will be beneficial as they pile up the years. A parent should first filter out these positive consequences and find ways to help retain them. This is important because the very engine of reinforcement procedures will attack the very causes of adolescent self esteem issues – or at least those causes which are capable of being changed. Here are some tips on how parents can help their teenagers deal with the aforementioned confidence problems: * Understanding instead of blaming. It often feels kind of instinctive to blame a person who is the cause of a particular problem. "It"s because you don't have a job!" "Why don't you try to give attention to your family, for a change?" "Any sane person will know when to stop such a vice!" These are usual reactions to the negative things we see. Instead of blaming our teenagers, we should try to let them know that we understand why they're feeling that way. This will cause them less stress, and will inform them that they have all the space they need to sort out their problems. * Compliments instead of complaints. Are you the preachy kind of parent? Are you quick to point out a problem before analyzing the details behind it? Stay away from this kind of mentality because it won't help your child cope with the self esteem issues he may be having. Instead, shower him with compliments. Even the smallest thing can be worthy of some praise. Make him know that he is appreciated. Make him know that he is loved. Make him know that he is special. Sometimes, this is all that he needs. * Inspiration instead of exasperation. Lack of self-confidence often arises from a seeming lack of purpose. Instead of giving up on your teenager, let him know how important he is to you. Let him know that he is your inspiration. This will give him a sense of purpose. This will tell him that he is good for at least one thing in this world: your happiness. Adolescent self esteem issues can be remedied. And parents, like you and me, can contribute a lot when it comes to helping our teenagers grow up with a good sense of self esteem.
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